09.22.09
Posted in Things that annoy me at 5:53 pm by PsychicDonut
Today, a news report stated that Yahoo! is going to spend $100M in advertising. They’ve also created their own color purple; it’s called “Yahoo purple.” *sigh* To quote one of my old employees “If they could only create their own money…”
No, I am not focusing on Yahoo, but I have noticed an alarming trend that seems to be wide spread in corporate America. But then again, maybe I am the only one who notices this. Common sense and logical thinking seem to have left the building! Maybe I am the only one who doesn’t get it, because I do not have a MBA. As a matter of fact, it seems to me that a MBA is probably required to make absolutely crazy and nonsensical business decisions (no offense to a few of my friends with MBAs).
I have often pondered this and yet never found an answer. If you are losing money, wouldn’t you take care of the source that is losing you the money? Wouldn’t you find a solution that solves the problem and will continue to do so in the future? Apparently a plan for the future is not something anyone looks at, but a mere “what should we do now?” Then the company goes after the quick fix and is shocked when the master plan blows up in their face, later on down the road. Instead of investing in something that truly does affect the bottom line, they are investing in a short-term solution that guarantees just that: a short term success.
Here is why I am confused about this. I am a homeowner. One day I come home and discover that I have a leak in one of my plumbing pipes, let’s say under the sink. What do I do? Hm, let’s see. I stuff a piece of cloth in there and hope that it will hold the water long enough before it causes severe damage. Of course not! No, I call a plumber who fixes the pipe so I won’t have the same issue again in the future. I spend my money wisely, knowing that a half-ass fix will save me money now, but then result in even higher costs down the road.
Sometimes business sense seems like a large case of insanity to me. Trying the same failing methods over and over and expecting a different outcome each time.
I have stood there numerous times over the years, while working for different companies, with my jaw dropping when I would hear some of the decisions they’ve made. I remember, one company I’ve worked for almost 10 years ago hiring numerous people and paying for relocation costs for some of them, then laying the same people off in a mass-lay off about 2 months later. Another company I’ve worked for decided to put a bunch of temp bodies on a specific project. None of the 30 some temps were even remotely qualified, but I guess there is strengths in numbers? Would they have hired a hand full of high quality full-time employees they STILL would have saved money. Alas, paying 30+ temps seemed more logical than paying half a dozen full-timers. Of course, the cost to constantly train new guys, due to the expected large turn-overs did not get put in the equation of “we are saving money here.”
Now, I am not going to bag on Yahoo, because I’ve worked for them too long and have plenty of friends who still work there. But am I really off my rocker when asking, “why wouldn’t you spend $100M on improving your technology and making strides towards your competitors THAT way?”
Maybe the problem lies in the sheer size of some corporations? Usually they start buying other companies, or open other branches, which are totally disconnected from the “mother ship.” The trend I have noticed is that the offices outside the headquarters are not only treated like an unwanted stepchild, but also operate in a total vacuum, far removed from everyone else. No one “on the top” seems to have the slightest clue what these guys are doing and even more important, what they need in order to be successful. When they report problems or ask for things they need, no one seems to listen and when all blows up in their face the top bozos ask “How could this have happened? Why did no one tell us!”
One boss once told me that one should never have emotion in business and that being a high ranking business person requires a certain sense of detachment and cool logic. I have always openly admitted to definitely lacking the sense of detachment or lack of emotion, but still pride myself on being a logical person. But then, I do not have a MBA and I think that is why I don’t understand the grand decisions made by these corporations. Come to think of it, this is probably also why I am not a business owner.
I am possibly over-simplifying it all. But then I am just not the one so caught up in politics that I can no longer make rational decisions, because my hands are tied by the top Muppet who makes the stupid decisions to begin with. But hey, at least he/she has a MBA and as we know, that means they are smarter than the rest of us.
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09.21.09
Posted in Humor/Funny at 6:21 pm by PsychicDonut
There are tons of funny sites out there, and I thought I’d share my favorite ones:
F*** my Life
Short excerpts of people who apparently have a great sense of humor and don’t mind sharing their most humiliating moments online.
http://www.fmylife.com
Texts from Last Night
Well, this one is not for everyone. It seems as if the average submitter age seems to be 21, so there are tons of drug and sex related texts on there that can get a bit tiresome. However, some of them are extremely hilarious. Here is an example:
(847): i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out…i went into my mom’s room to say goodnight and i don’t remember anything…she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes “whats so funny?” and i go “there are 7 people sitting on my knees” and she goes “doesn’t that hurt?” and i said “no we’re sitting in a bowl” and then i capped it off and said “join the crazy train bro” and passed out.
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com
The Fail Blog
This one is definitely worth visiting…a LOT!
http://www.failblog.org
People of Walmart
I think this has to be my favorite one! I mean, we all know how I LOVE Walmart!!! This reassures me yet again that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me for not setting foot into a Walmart!
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com
Enjoy!
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09.16.09
Posted in Things that annoy me at 6:57 pm by PsychicDonut
Reading the presidential debates about public health-care, I am safely concluding that the US probably has turned into the biggest nightmare; namely for the ultra-conservative, racist, bible preaching rednecks who are still roaming this country in large numbers. What a horror that a black man is our president, and that he doesn’t have a name like “John Smith!”
I happen to agree with Jimmy Carter. I also think that Wilson’s outburst is based on race. Why? Because he reacted like any typical Southern good ol’ boy who had to sit there and respect a colored fellow for his opinion. What scares me is not so much that people like this are spread in vast numbers across the country, but that they are actually in politics where they influence others with their crap.
I was shocked that anyone would be so disrespectful towards the president. I mean, I don’t recall anyone ever calling G.W. a liar, idiot or whatever else, when it would have been appropriate in that case. Nevertheless, one should have more respect than that!
Meanwhile, I am still annoyed at the stupid Florida idiots who refused to let their kids watch the president’s message about staying in school. I just don’t get it. I am really trying to understand where someone becomes so ignorant. But then, I assume being raised that way largely contributes. Sometimes I just feel as if I am still living in the 19th century. I wonder if these idiots ever watch international TV and then wonder if THEY are the reason Americans are considered stupid, ignorant and uneducated. How sad, that a bunch of morons are shaping the outlook of the rest of the world on all of us 
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09.08.09
Posted in Things that annoy me at 2:59 pm by PsychicDonut
Another one I got from Yahoo’s homepage. These things are all common sense and as usual, some of the comments suggest that these behaviors are merely one’s freedom to express oneself and one’s pursuit of happiness! It never ceases to amaze me what people perceive as their god given right, simply because they show up to work and grace their employers with their presence! Of course, they all have a big mouth about their given rights until they get laid off. Then they go on whining and bitching, or even suing the company. Try firing someone who violates rules, or is incompetent. But that is another blog!
I got laid off, but thank god, it was due to the company downsizing, not because I had a sense of entitlement, took my job for granted, or took advantage of the company!
I can tell tons of stories about morons who kept stealing other people’s lunches, especially those who took bites out of people’s sandwiches and put the half eaten sandwich back into the fridge, or the constant “fish cookers” in the office that left most of us gagging. I can add on even more things one shouldn’t do in the office, but I am not going to list them here 
1. Don’t! Be the Office Downer
You don’t want to be such a buzz kill that people arrange their desks away from you.
That’s what Caroline Melville, owner of virtual administrative service VirtuallySorted.com, had to do after hiring an accountant to work with her small team.
In the mornings, when Melville asked how he was doing, he would respond with a deadpan, “I am not dead yet.”
If the company booked a new client and the office was celebrating their success, he would pipe in with, “Ah, I don’t know. I don’t know. He might leave.”
The eternal optimist didn’t stay long. He resigned when his wife got a new job and needed to move. But Melville didn’t complain.
“It was quite a sigh of relief for me, actually, because it was quite stressful having someone like that in the office.”
2. Don’t! Microwave Fish in the Office
Tuna sandwiches are banned from some offices, but fish dishes in the microwave are absolutely off limits.
“I never knew who the culprit was because the kitchen area was not near my desk,” says Casey Corrigan, a media strategist at a New York City PR firm. The smell would waft through the office gently at first, and “then you would feel it more pungently.”
You don’t want your cube mates wishing you would sleep with the fishes.
3. Don’t! Go Barefoot
“Everybody wants to wear really cute shoes, and they go out and get five-inch tall Christian Louboutin shoes,” reports a tipster who asked to remain anonymous because she feared she would lose her job for outing co-workers.
“If you cannot walk in them, you should really go for a more sensible shoe.”
Resorting to kicking off your stilettos under the desk is permissible at the end of a long day, but “walking around the office barefoot is really gross.”
4. Don’t! Set Your Ring Tone to the Jonas Brothers
Keep your phone on vibrate. Your officemates notice your ring tone — especially if it’s particularly loud and annoying.
“You would see five or six people who sat around her look at her and roll their eyes,” says Richard O’Malley, remembering a former receptionist whose ring tone for her boyfriend was a Jonas Brothers song.
At the sound of the boy-band melody, the woman would leave her desk to take the call. “It wound up working against her because everyone knew that she was slacking off,” says O’Malley, who now runs his own event-planning business, The O’Malley Project
Eventually she was let go. And even though her ring tone wasn’t specifically at fault, it didn’t help. “There were several minor things that built up,” says O’Malley.
“If you are the person who has the stupid cell phone ring, everyone has noticed it already. Turn it down.”
5. Do! Save Smiley Faces for Mom
Sherry Kerr, the owner of a small public relations agency, hired a recent college graduate to be her assistant and was confronted with an acute case of smiley face overload.
They were on the picture frame, clock, mouse pad, screen saver and a decoy on the monitor. “The desk space itself was really dreadful,” says Kerr.
But it didn’t end there: She also put smiley faces next to her initials and every single place she signed her name — including the company’s tax forms.
Kerr tried to talk to the assistant about presenting a more professional manner in person and on paper. Her response? “She looked at me with these big round smiley face eyes and said, `It is a part of my signature,’” Kerr remembers.
Kerr eventually had to let her go, for unrelated reasons, but, Kerr says, “I have to confess that I was happy about not seeing smiley faces anymore.”
6. Don’t! Be the Boss’ New BFF
“People who are worried about being laid off end up going overboard to prove that they are indispensable, and that ends up making them seem so obnoxious to people,” says Tina Lewis Rowe, a professional development coach.
Rowe consulted at one firm where she watched an employee try to position himself as the boss’ right arm. “At every staff meeting he would try to take the meeting over and ask employees report to him to get approval.”
Instead of becoming the main man’s right-hand, Mr. Sycophant just annoyed the entire office. His co-workers don’t have much use for him, and his managers see right through his tricks, Rowe says.
And while he is still at the firm, “he is on shaky ground,” she adds.
7. Don’t! Read Your Emails Out Loud
Keep a lid on it, neighbor. One wife complained — on her husband’s behalf — about a coworker who reads her emails out loud. And listens to her voicemails on speakerphone. Seriously.
“My husband works right next (as in their desks are connected with no real divider, like Dwight and Jim on “The Office”) to a woman who does all of her work, all day long, out loud,” says the woman, who wanted to remain anonymous to protect her husband.
Now her husband has to take any serious reading home and do it at night because he can’t concentrate in the office.
8. Don’t! Give Yourself a Mani/Pedi
“I had a boss who would clip his nails at his desk,” says Michelle Poteet, who now owns Reclaim Order, a San Antonio-based life-organizing company.
“The next position I was at, the guy across from me would clip his nails at his desk, and to me it is the worst sounding thing in the world.”
“It would be one thing if you waited until there was background noise, but it always seemed to me that people, would do this when it was dead silence. Getting rid of a hang nail would be fine, but it is another thing if they are giving themselves a complete manicure.”
9. Don’t! Steal Food
Keep your mitts off other people’s frozen lunches. One anonymous reporter out in the field says that her Lean Cuisines disappear from the freezer on a regular basis.
“It has happened pretty much every where that I have worked,” complains the office worker in distress.
Not even writing her name in black Sharpie across the box deters thieves. So instead, the lunch lady keeps her thawing Lean Cuisine in her desk.
Yum.
10. Don’t! Crank the Russian Folk Music
Headphones, people.
There is no faster way to top “cube rube” status than to crank your music.
“We had one person who was playing Russian folk music all day long,” says Megan Slabinski, executive director of The Creative Group, a California-based staffing agency.
The constant drone of Russian folk music got so draining to a freelancer the Group had placed, one of the employees had to ask the company to curb the staffer’s habit.
Oddly, management was reluctant to address the issue, reports Slabinski.
“Ultimately, we encouraged them to say, could you please put on a pair of headphones?”
You may think that you are all by your lonesome in your cube, but don’t forget about your proximity to others. And if the spirit moves you, and you must have a bit of your motherland’s music to get you through your day, headphones, people. Headphones.
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09.04.09
Posted in Humor/Funny at 11:47 am by PsychicDonut
I have a fascination with astrology. I have “studied” it since I was 15 years old and have a pretty damn good understanding of star signs and how they work. Hence, I figured I should make up Carmenator’s list of bad astrological traits. Why focus on the good sides, if you can rip on the bad ones. And since I am an equal opportunity hater, all signs are equally ripped to shreds, including my own, the Virgo.
Capricorn
Oh yeah, let’s date the downer and ultimate pessimist. The one who sees the glass as half empty and usually has the spontaneity of a pet rock. You want excitement? This is NOT the partner to give it to you. They also tend to have a sense of entitlement and prefer “arm candy” or how they appear to others, over real substance. Capricorns feel a need to complain a lot and are never satisfied.
Aquarius
Yay, the sign of crazy nuts and sociopaths. Do you want no commitment but tons of roller coaster behavior that makes no sense and will probably include cheating, then this is the sign for you! Hey, on the bright side they DO believe all the conspiracy theories are true, which turns them into paranoid schizophrenics. Walking down the street with an Aquarian is good times. They can frequently be heard saying things like “HE IS ONE OF THEM!”
Pisces
Pisces are awesome…as doormats. They tend to have no self esteem and drown their sorrow with either tons of alcohol, or lots of drugs. Anything, really, to help the little fishy escape reality and responsibility. When they feel they have been abused enough, they’ll wander off with someone else who tends to be just as crazy as the one they’ve left. They ARE relationship experts…NOT! And just like Cancers, it is never their fault.
Aries
Want to get in a fight? Pick an Aries. They love to argue for the sake of argument. They love getting a rise out of you, tend to sport smart ass remarks and feel that the rules don’t apply to them. Let’s not forget that the actual “ram” image already says it, stubborn as hell! Aries always think they are right, no matter what. Unlike other “right” people though, they insist on their “righteousness.” Tact is also highly overrated for an Aries.
Taurus
Ah, another earth sign. This one might be the only sign out there that can easily compete with the Capricorn when it comes to boredom. Except that the Taurus tends to be lazy on top of being a bore. Want to have wild sex? The ox will only be interested if you dangle a sandwich in his face. Moving fast is NOT his/her friend, neither is getting things done. They pout and tend to get passive aggressive.
Gemini
Want to be with a master manipulator? The twin will be a good bet for one. Geminis are intelligent, and mental nut cases. They ARE called “twins” for a reason and there are two sides to them, both of which are crazy. They shine with smart ass comments and are usually superficial, like their fellow air brethren, the Libra and Aquarian. A Gemini needs to be with someone who is good looking. They prefer good looking over character, which is why they usually end up in relationships with nutcrackers.
Cancer
They have a motto “woe is me” or “whahaa.” The cancer is always misunderstood. No one loves them, they shine with low self-esteem and nothing is their fault. They are also master manipulators, but unlike the Geminis they manipulate emotionally. They have more issues than a Hollywood magazine stand and cry a lot about spilled milk. The Cancer gets their feelings hurt about every 5 minutes and it will always be YOUR fault.
Leo
Leos don’t go to a party, they ARE the party. They shine with an ego larger than life, they need to be the center of attention and turn into true jerks if they don’t get it. They are passive aggressive and if you don’t get the “subtle” hints they become viscous and mean. They are a legend in their own minds and feel they deserve everything and everyone. Leos are demanding, obsessive, hyper sensitive and jealous. They are also bullies.
Virgo
The industrial maiden. Another fine example of pessimism, nit picking and constant nagging. The Virgo always knows what’s best for you, and everyone else. She is as much fun as getting a cavity filled at the dentist office and finds herself alone a lot. That is because most of her friends ran away from her constant nagging and judgment. The Virgo hardly ever gets anywhere in life, because she “loves to operate in the background.” She bitches and whines about it a lot, but her fear of success usually keeps her where she is at.
Libra
They do enjoy the finer things in life, but don’t really like working for them. Libras can make it an art form to marry well. They tend to have no opinion and flip flop on all issues as much as a leaf that blows in the wind. They won’t have your back in a fight, because they see “both sides of the equation” and therefore pair up well with the equally indecisive Gemini. It’s not that they are too shy to voice their opinion, they simply won’t have one; which is a good thing, you’ll never be wrong.
Scorpio
Scorps are fine friends to have, if you wanna die. Cross them in any shape or form and it’s bad times. They never forgive, are notoriously vicious and hold grudges, for years! They can be another “glass half empty” kinda person, except that they do it with a superior “I only believe in what can be proven” attitude. They know your deepest darkest secrets and WILL use them against you if necessary. They are also very ambitious and have no problem screwing their way to the top. Hey, whatever it takes!
Sagittarius
Such jolly characters they are! They suffer from diarrhea of the mouth and never hold back. Diplomacy is not their strong trait. They fall in love very quickly and are willing to move across continents to be with their love. Of course, they fall also out of love equally as quickly and become bored with anyone who is “mainstream.” Which translates into anyone stable. Sages don’t usually get far in life because they can’t be bothered to hold on to anything for longer periods of time without getting bored.
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09.03.09
Posted in Things that annoy me at 2:16 pm by PsychicDonut
For #$%^ sake, some people should not be allowed to vote! The level of stupid idiots who publicly post their dumb, uninformed, bias and prejudice opinions never ceases to amaze me. The fact that some of them are in politics or government jobs is even scarier! AND so is the fact that they call it “freedom of speech” and their right totheir opinion. Blech.
So, our president chose to tell young people about the importance of staying in school. THIS is what he was going to tell students:
“I’m going to be making a big speech to young people all across the country about the importance of education; about the importance of staying in school; how we want to improve our education system and why it’s so important for the country. So I hope everybody tunes in.”
Somehow the chairman of the Republican party of, where else? Florida, turns it into a brainwashing agenda on behalf of our already evil president:
“The address scheduled for September 8, 2009, does not allow for healthy debate on the President’s agenda, but rather obligates the youngest children in our public school system to agree with our President’s initiatives or be ostracized by their teachers and classmates.”
Yes, the horror! Our children could be driven into the grasps of a black Democrat, especially since the success of the last Republican cowboy leader can not easily be topped! Man, when I read stuff like that I am reminded of the same amount of numb nuts who put bumper stickers on their SUVs or trucks reading “No Muslim is Going to be MY President.”
Yeah, let’s NOT promote the fact that kids need to stay in school, shouldn’t drop out and that it is therefore important for our president to stress that he is behind schools and education, by backing more educational programs. Especially since this country ranks so high in the world when it comes to education and knowledge, even though we are considered THE world power. Yes, let’s promote the continued stereotype of how stupid we are by blasting more stupidity out in the world for all to hear.
I get so angry when I see good intentions of a person turned into a witch hunt of douche baggish ignorance, so one can justify one’s continued decline of common sense and integrity. Yay, some of the schools decided to not air this program. I am pretty sure they are the same school who would have had no issue airing the same thing, if it had come from Texas cowboy numb nuts George W. ACH!
To quote Patton Oswalt “I HATE, I HATE….”
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09.02.09
Posted in Life at 3:17 pm by PsychicDonut
The average has changed in many areas of life. The average clothing size of women is now a 12 to 14. The average age when women give birth has gone up and 50% of all babies are born to women in their 30s and 40s. The average height of women in America is 5′4,” our life expectancy has gone up to about 75 and we have found many ways to beat death or aging…to a degree!
I am turning 40 tomorrow and for the first time in my life am not looking forward to my birthday. I couldn’t quite figure out why this one is putting me in such a bad mood, when overall I never cared about my age. I was one of those who never wanted to be older or younger, but always felt OK with whatever age I was. This one is different.
I think at age 40, or in one’s 40s, we realize a few things that we didn’t realize before. I think reaching 40 for me is different, because it shows reality so much “harsher” than any other time before. Somehow in my 20s and 30s there was always a “I can do that later,” and I can put it off for when I am ready. Of course, in some things “ready” never quite came and so I am presented with what truly is, versus what I envisioned as a kid. And what truly is, is the fact that I am just average.
I fought being average for as long as I remember. I had this horrible fear of disappearing completely if I would be like “everyone else.” Oddly enough, that is exactly what I am. I am the average size 12, the average 5′3,” drive the average American car, get up every morning to earn a living, and no, it’s not in some glamorous way like acting, or singing, etc. I never did become like Madonna and no, I wasn’t the second Betty Page. My looks are not average, because of the hair colors I am sporting, the way I dress and my tattoos, but my life, my thinking and being very much are.
I have lived half (or maybe more than half?) of my life and the choices I’ve made, the turns my life took are vastly different from what I envisioned when I started out. Don’t get me wrong, my life went in many ways BETTER than I envisioned it. In my own way I did a few things that are extraordinary given where and how I started out, but there was a “ceiling” to it all. I fought so hard to not be average and find myself thinking “hm, but that’s who you are.”
I wanted to be thinner, richer, more successful and have at least one child by the time I reached 40. It pains me to look into the mirror and see fine lines around my eyes and “things” starting to not look so great anymore. I am stuck between a stubborn “screw this, my husband thinks me the hottest woman in the world” and the “man, I should be a size 6 again.” I am torn between “bring on the red wine and my occasional burger” and the “you really need to quit smoking and take better care of your health.” I hate working out, but know in my mind that I really “ought to” do it. I went to the doctor and she confirmed that eating “normal” or the way I have been eating the past few years would now make me gain weight, because my metabolism is slowing way down. *sigh* Conceiving a child will also be much harder, given the fact that I no longer release an egg every month and that I am no longer sure if I could do the “stay up all night and be sleep deprived for a few months” thing. Yes, I know, my girlfriends have done it and with the exception of one, they were all in their late 30s or early 40s when they gave birth. Knowing this makes me feel even more like a whimp.
I am coming to terms with the fact that I am, well, not that extraordinary, except to those who really love and know me. I realize that I am no longer the “hot, skinny” thing in the club but the weird looking cougar (thank god for hating clubs!). I am grateful for having the one thing that I still believe matters most, which is love. I can honestly say that I feel more loved now than I have in many years. I can also say that I found in many ways exactly what I was looking for in life. So no, I am not turning this into a “woe is me” whining thing.
It’s just that once this young German girl set out to conquer the world doing something “really big” and something that would “matter to many” in a far away land called “America” and instead I find myself a middle-aged woman, battling weight issues, working in corporate America and realizing that what I do, the choices I make do NOT affect the whole world, but a much smaller group of people. I realize that I am maybe both, extraordinary, but not in the way I dreamed about it, and ordinary, but not as bad as I feared.
They say that life is getting better in your 40s. At least that is what all my friends say who are in their 40s. I believe that! I just wished that I would have had the same wisdom, values, thoughts and success when I was still sporting the younger and thinner body
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