People have often asked me how one meditates. People ask, how do you quiet your own mind, when you barely find the ability to focus on a book you want to read? Hence, for all those who quiver when being presented with the idea of meditation, I want to call it something different, I am going to call it “visualization;” and I say everyone can do it, unless you are void of all imagination and don’t know how to daydream.
Why is it so important to do this? Because if one visualizes specific things over and over, they become imprinted in one’s subconscious mind, and THIS is what creates your reality. There are plenty of people who try to argue this and swear that their reality is created by conscious choices. Which is predominantly true for “healthy” people.
Let me demonstrate this. Most people have encountered at least one drama queen in their life. What I mean by that is a person who has one bad thing happen after another. A person who gets into car accidents, loses jobs, has abusive relationships, no or shitty friends, is lonely, maybe was diagnosed with cancer, gets evicted, loses their home, etc.. I think you get the picture. A lot of these things can happen to “normal” people, but what makes the “crazy makers” (how my therapist used to call them) stand out is that it never ends. It is one bad thing after another and it is never their fault. They are a constant victim of life and circumstances and while they often do have small glimpses of “truth” their story remains “It isn’t my fault and I did nothing to bring this on.” I am sure you know what I am talking about here.
To a degree one could argue that it isn’t their fault, would there not be such a thing as actively creating one’s reality. Excuse the words I am using now, but victims and martyrs have no free will at all. They are slaves to their stories of victimization and know how to suffer so much better that they actually create these bad situations, subconsciously! There is no free will, because they are conditioned to expect the worse, to “never win” and to “always get beaten.” They are not only more than three times more likely to get into accidents, but also more than five times more likely to get terminally ill. They are actively poisoning their mind, body and spirit and as many can attest, their surroundings.
Many of us had bad things happen to us. We are all survivors of one thing or another, but what differentiates us and defines us in character and spirit, is how we are dealing with the bad things and how we are treating those around us as we are hurting. Lashing out, abusing and bad-mouthing others are definitely not the strong suits of great spirit and character. Justifying one’s bad behaviors and insisting on not being at fault, having no accountability and pointing fingers is another indicator of the persons I have described above. If you now add on how no one ever does or gives enough to them, you’ll have the full picture. Like a virus, they are sucking up your energy and emotions and still remain a bucket with a huge hole on the bottom.
We do have free will and we can visualize what it is we want for ourselves. We can visualize the life we want to have, the jobs, relationships and friendships we would like to attract and we can actively work towards it by making conscious choices that support these images.
When we drop our attachment to being a victim and take true responsibility for our own well-being and state of mind, we create a world that is fairly free of suffering and predominantly filled with joy and happiness. The more we become our “higher” self, the better the quality of our lives become.
It took me a very long time to really grasp the concepts of this. When I hit rock bottom emotionally, I felt I had nothing else to lose and gave it a try. Every time I was feeling angry and bitter, I told myself out loud “STOP!” Every time I envisioned horrible things, I stopped it and if I had no tools to envision happy things, I watched a movie that made me happy, or listened to a song that makes me feel better, etc. Every time my mind would follow the hard-wired neuro-pathways in my brain to suspicion, obsession, fear and paranoia, I’d stop in mid track and either talk about it to someone I trusted, saying things like “I need your help right now,” or working out. Every time I wanted to spew negativity on my blog, I walked away and didn’t write at all. Hence, the large gaps between blogs at times.
I would find activities, words and actions that would deter the bad and negative energy, and create positive and healing energy instead. One could call it spiritual alchemy.
What started happening was remarkable! Not only were people who no longer served my path taken out, but I started attracting whatever I wanted, LITERALLY! For example, after Yahoo laid me off, I couldn’t figure out for the life of me what I wanted to do. I bounced from one idea to the next and attracted NO JOB! Finally, one day my husband asked me, “well, if you could do anything what would you want to do?” I said “I really want to do fraud prevention for gaming. I want to catch bad guys for gaming, because I love to game and I think it would be fun.” Within less than a month I received an offer as fraud consultant for one of the largest gaming companies in the world.
While I was working for them though, I realized that I actually didn’t like working for gaming. I felt that working in the gaming world was really not so different than working in the entertainment industry, which was one I always vowed I’d never work for. My contract was actually not running out until March 31, which didn’t stop me from quitting in February!
I delivered and fulfilled my contract. At the same time though, I started networking again. I was networking with so many different people that job interviews started literally pouring in. At one point I was interviewing with three companies at the same time, one of them being one of the largest corporations in the world and dangling the ultimate carrot in front of my nose.
So here were the choices: A giant who was never really rejected from anyone, a smaller company who helped people find their life partners and finally, the third one, another smaller company who actually has a mission statement that reads that they are dedicated to being a positive force in people’s life. What do they do? They provide psychic readings and astrological charts.
As soon as the job for the Psychic site was posted on LinkedIn, I received an email from one of my ex Yahoo employees. She felt that this would be perfect and after reading the job description, I had to agree. We all know that I love doing fraud prevention, but doing it for something I have incorporated in my personal life for more than ten years seemed to be a dream come true. Anyone who knows me is aware that I always “wanted to change the world.” And hello, my blog is the Psychic Donut for a reason! If you know me well, you know why it is called that!
So, before I received a job offer from any of the companies, I felt it was the right thing to do to quit. I had no other job lined up, my husband had just returned from his project, but that didn’t stop me. I had never felt stronger in my gut that I had found my purpose and it was NOT working for the giant, making a gazillion dollars and having a whole boat load of prestige attached. My calling was out there and I didn’t quite know what that would be, but I did know that I was close to finding it.
My last day with the gaming company was Friday, February 19. I had marched into my bosses office three weeks prior and told him that it was time for me to move on. At that point, the Psychics weren’t even in the picture yet. I felt in my gut that I was about to get my chance, and the feeling was so overwhelmingly strong that I walked out without having a back up.
I visualized. I decided that I wanted to align all my efforts and energy from now on with strengthening my higher self. I had signed up for Reiki I about a month earlier (and taking my intro class on Sunday), I signed up to work with Stand Up for Kids again, an organization who helps homeless children to get off the streets and asked to be their director of volunteers. I had decided that I wanted to fight fraudsters, but in an environment where it would aid other people. I had painted my picture of the life I wanted from following point, approx. 15 months ago:
1. Laid off by the company I had been with for almost 8 years
2. Dumped by the guy I was with for almost 2 years
3. Feeling utterly useless and worthless, thinking that no one in the world wants me, sees me or understands me
I got tired of my own BS and martyr story in February of 2009. I visualized a life in which I was married to my soul-mate, the man who’d love me more than anything else in the whole world and thought me all the things others did not.
I visualized working in a company that made a difference, fighting crime and having fun, whilst living in my own home.
I visualized myself getting in shape, working out, losing weight and becoming healthy. I gained a bunch of healthy muscle mass, lost 15 lbs and five inches on my waist alone. And what did my trainer teach me “I CAN’T IS NOT IN OUR VOCABULARY!”
In other words, I visualized that turning 40 would be the beginning of the life I always wanted and the death of the life I had lived, which was a lie.
I believed it so strongly that I created EXACTLY that. Top that ye of little faith, doubting Thomases and nay-saying pessimists. I have found my bliss, and I created it out of a pile of rubbish, and so can everyone else out there!
The only person that is stopping you, is you!
